#24 financial health

“Wealth is not about having a lot of money; it’s about having a lot of options.” – Chris Rock

“People say that money is not the key to happiness, but I always figured if you have enough money, you can have a key made.” – Joan Rivers

Hello my lovelies,

I consider myself, these days, an holistic writer, someone who writes about everything wellbeing, but how can I do that when I haven’t spoken about the one thing most people avoid, especially people who are mentally ill like me? Finances. Money.

Financial health is arguably becoming a more present topic in this age, but so many people with mental illness do not share their situation. We are more likely to be in higher debt with a lower amount of savings. I won’t get into the why because there are so many causes and conditions and I also promised at the beginning of this journey not to be political. But as a statistic, according Mental Health and Money Advice, “Four million people in the UK have both mental health and money problems, and a further four million are at risk because they’re having financial difficulties.”

I have a fraught history with financial health, and really, this post is me telling you my story in the hopes it can be of use to someone, to break the stigma of getting into debt, not having financial literacy for a long time and illustrate how it can have such a huge impact on our mental and emotional health. But first, we need to define financial health and wellbeing.

Money and Pensions Service states that financial wellbeing is about feeling secure and in control. It’s about making the most of your money from day to day, dealing with the unexpected, and being on track for a healthy financial future. In short: financially resilient, confident, and empowered. People who experience financial wellbeing are less stressed about money. This, in turn, has positive effect on their overall mental and physical health.

My story

My financial literacy, from a young age, was never great. Despite having jobs and incomes over the years, I could never quite get a handle on what this kind of wellbeing was, how to have that security and sense of relief. My little phone bill and board would be paid but the rest? Well, alcoholism at 18/19 years old pretty much took care of that. When I wasn’t drinking it was going on needless purchases. Books and stationery cheered me up. But by age 21 I had £2500 debt on my credit cards.

You see, if I was manic I would spend it on bags I would rarely use and books I would never read. I don’t really remember what it actually went on. Last year I realised I would spend in excess of £150 on snacks and takeaways in the throws of declining mental health. It turns out, I really do love to comfort eat as a pick-me-up. All this buying, in my extreme moods, was an incessant need. I just couldn’t stop. One of my pitfalls in not being able to save was this, despite paying all my bills, I would overspend on my credit card, become poor in paying it all off and then using savings to cover the rest.

Now, there were periods where I would be okay, I would build up some savings and clear my credit cards but then I would inevitably spiral. It has been a rocky road. How did it come to this? Education. I was never educated or supported to know what financial wellbeing looked like, what it meant to actually be secure.

However, last year in my breakdown I had to leave my job. I am still not well enough to go back in to full-time employment but this blow really set me on the right course. I have a household to run with my fiancé. So I learned to prioritise. I made new events in calendars of what bills and when, cancelled those unused subscriptions, made a mini template of my bills in an electronic ticky list so I can track everything. I am slowly building up savings because I hope to have a good few months of bill money set aside by the end of the next year.

My habits, whilst not the best at times, are far far better. I haven’t been this stable in a long time. I have some savings, I am not in debt, I can pay my bills comfortably. I now know that having an urge to buy random items on impulse is actually a sign I am not doing well, so I now know how to rectify that.

I cannot tell you how hard it is to have something like EUPD and trying to manage money, especially with such limited knowledge from a young age. Habits do not stop easily. To me, I feel secure in what I have, I know that whilst I am not 100% secure, I have a little buffer and should the unexpected happen, I will know how to prioritise. I am proud of where I have gotten to. For me personally, finances have been one of my biggest triggers since I got my first job and started exploring beyond my home. If I saw my debt I would cry, I would try to rectify it and it would go wrong. I am far more sensible and live well within my means now. I no longer worry about whether I can afford to put money aside or afford to have the odd singular book purchase.